Week 4
I spent the better part of last week's write up describing a terrible fear I had about this football season and Lenny's ability to circumvent his run of bad luck. In consideration of this past weekend's developments, it is my duty to retract all statements about Lenny's football ability. We did exchange a few words yesterday:
Lenny: You get another write-up while my football life goes directly into the crapper
Lenny: Both my fantasy teams are hopeless
3:56 PM
Randie: yup
Randie: I have to post a retraction
Lenny: well. I won't be down forever.
It seems like you will buddy. Where to begin? Raiders. Oh Raiders. A whopping 165 yards of total offense against a mediocre-at-best Texan's defense. Houston's NFL-worst run D held the Raiders to just 45 yards on the ground. To put this in perspective, in our Yahoo league the top Raider's point getter is Louis Murphy ranked 148th. I did notice a Fantasy trend right after the game... everyone on earth dropped McFadden at the same time causing some kind of internet clog not unlike the way cholesterol clogs the artery (6 carries for -3 yards on Sunday). From good to bad, Len's week 2 triumph's are a distant memory after his FF defeats in weeks 3 and 4. I'm not the only one with this thought:
Me: Yeah your team isn't very good.
anonymous FF'ler: Yeah, well, at least I'm not Lenny.
Cold Dude! Seems like Lenny has become the Munson of Fantasy Sports. My team got Lennyed this weekend. My quarterback pulled a Lenny on Sunday.
Herr Shitzdabed can be considered nothing more than a Null Set. He's not positive or negative, he's the absence of value. Let's pray TFT can shake out the cob webs to prevent L from committing hara kari.
I really shouldn't be talking this much smack. I'm 2-2, 1-3 and 0-4 in my three fantasy leagues. The bag, as you can see is all tied up and so is the side bet. So no, things are not as bad as they seem for our fine farty friend. He does have two 0-4 Bag teams which is pretty awesome for me. Guess what else is awesome for me?? The Fish looked awesome against the Bills. Super awesome! A solid trouncing. Ballchin Henne led the team well.
Newsflash
The Shitstains traded a dropsey for a Stuckey. Braylon "Tits-for-Hands" Edwards gets to come to NYC in exchage for Chansi Stuckey, a special team douche and a couple of draft picks. Cleveland's bound to get a win or two at some point. They looked decidedly better with Derrick Anderson than Brady Quinn. Brady Quinn? That's a terrible name for a quarterback. Speaking of Quarterbacks, wouldn't it make more sense for the shitstains to trade for Dirty Sanchez??? I'm just saying.
What's a really bad name?
Here I've compiled a list of the ten worst and best quarterback names (past and present). Let's face it, you have to be a man's man to lead a professional football team and someone named Chad isn't going to garner much respect.
10 Best
- Joe Montana
- Archie Manning
- Dan Marino
- Johnny Unitas
- Bart Starr
- Warren Moon
- Sonny Jurgenson
- Boomer Esiason
- Tom Brady
- Bob Griese
Honorable Mention: "Broadway" Joe Namath, Ben Roethlisberger
10 Worst
- Tony Romo
- Jake Delhomme
- Peyton Manning
- Trent Dilfer
- Eli Manning
- Marc Bulger
- Brady Quinn
- Cade McNown
- Doug Flutie
- Elvis Grbac
Honorable Mention: Heath Shuler, Colt McCoy. This guy is a douche rocket.
What were you thinking Archie??? Peyton and Eli sound like a Brokeback Mountain spinoff series on the Showtime. Bulger?? The only thing Bulgering right now is his butt from riding the pine. Big Ben would have made the top 10 but nope, too long, my rules. Boomer could easily be in the worst if he went by Norman. Notice anything? Not a lot of tribesmen in that group? Where are you Jay Fiedler??? Seriously though, it really doesn't matter what your name is. If names were a measure of success then Lenny would change his name to Lenny Doody.
On the Ipod right now: This Ain't Living, G. Love & Special Sauce. (sorry PA, if Borden can steal it then so can I).
Iphone App of the Week: Geo-Defense Swarm
Bag Games:
DAL @ KC
WAS @ CAR
MIN @ STL
PIT @ DET
CLE @ BUF ****
JAC @ SEA
bye, by, buy - Saints
Side Bet
A Bag! A Bag on both your Houses!
Dolphins 1-3
Raiders 1-3
Till next week!
R
Null set. Huh. That's not very nice.
You watch. I'm going to get a win out of Buffalo this week. And with Eli out, I think the Raiders have a chance at Giants Stadium on Sunday.
BTW, everyone dropped McFadden because he got hurt. He had surgery and is out 4-6.
Nice work on the QB names. You forgot Gus Frerotte from the worst list.